President Bush Dodges Questions, Shoes At Iraqi Press Conference
“So what if the guy threw his shoes at me?” questioned President Bush in the wake of an attempted assault in Baghdad. In the midst of a surprise final visit to Iraq, an intrepid Iraqi reporter, later identified as “Shoeless” Muntadar al-Zeidi, abandoned his objective journalistic stance and let his unconventional footwork do the talking as he alternately flung both shoes at the American President. Although considered a grave affront to dignity in the Muslim world, the subtle severity of the foot-based insult failed to translate across a deep cultural divide; “I don’t know what his beef is,” the President remarked, citing the “unusual” move as “a sign of a free society.” The President displayed remarkable reactions and feline-like agility when he dodged the full pair of flying footwear. The barefoot assailant was quickly swept off his feet by startled bystanders and searched from head-to-toe for any remaining projectiles. In what will surely be regarded as one of the most bizarrely comedic missteps of the Iraq War, the President downplayed the significance of the bipedal terrorism and sidestepped most questions relating to the incident, choosing instead to focus on the continued need for American boots on the ground. Given the recent decision of the Iraqi Assembly, this drastic increase in shoe-related violence comes at an inopportune moment for the Americans, who find themselves in the awkward position of having one foot out the door, while the other remains firmly planted in Iraq.
Zack Freundlich
